Elephant Stew - cooking recipe

Ingredients

1 medium size elephant
brown gravy
salt and pepper to taste
2 rabbits (optional)

Preparation

Measure 3 cups of flour into large bowl; answer telephone. Take large bowl off small sons head; sweep up floor.
Measure 3 cups of flour in large bowl.
Measure 1/4 cup shortening; answer door bell.
Wash shortening from sons hands and face.
Add 1/4 cup shortening to flour; mix well.
Rock crying baby ten minutes. Answer telephone.
Put son in tub and scrub well.
Scrape flour and shortening mixture from floor, adding enough tears to relieve tension.
Open 1 can of beans with remaining strength.