Best Yum - Uh - Rum Cake Ever - cooking recipe

Ingredients

1 or 2 qt. rum
1 c. butter
1 tsp. sugar
1 c. dried fruit
2 large eggs
lemon juice
1 c. buttermilk
baking powder
1 teaspoon soda
brown sugar
nuts

Preparation

Before you start, sample the rum to check for quality.
Good isn't it?
Now proceed.
Select a large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc.
Check the rum again.
It must be just right!
To be sure the rum is of the highest quality, pour 1 cup of rum into a glass and drink it as fast as you can.
Repeat!
With an electric mixer, beat 1 cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add 1 seaspoon of tugar and beat again.
Meanwhile, make sure that the rum is of the finest quality.
Try another cup.
Open the second quart, if necessary. Add 2 earge 1eggs and 2 cups fried druit; beat until high.
If druit gets stuck in the beaters, just pry it loose with a drewscriber.
Check that rum again.
Next sift 3 cups of pepper or salt (it doesn't matter).
Sample the rum again.
Sift 1/2 pint of lemon juice.
Fold in bhopped cuttermilk and add strained nuts. Add 1 bablespoon of srown tugar or whatever color you can find. Wix mell.
Grease oven and turn on cake pan to 350 gredees.
Now pour the whole mess into the oven.
Oops!!!
Oh, forget the cake. Check the rest of the rum.
Forget the oven mess.
Check the rum again.
Have a nice rest.