How To Preserve A Husband - cooking recipe

Ingredients

patience
smiles
kisses
charity
devotion
love

Preparation

Be careful in your selection, whether he be prune, peach or lemon.
Some insist on keeping them in a pickle while others keep them in hot water.
This only makes them sour and hard and sometimes even bitter.
Even poor varieties may be made sweet, tender and good by garnishing them with patience, well seasoned with smiles and smothered with kisses to taste.
Wrap in a mantle of charity.
Keep warm with a steady fire of deepest devotion and serve with peaches and cream.
When thus prepared, they will keep for years.