Elephant Soup - cooking recipe

Ingredients

1 large elephant (African is best)
600 gal. water
4 pecks onions, chopped
2 bushels potatoes, peeled and sliced
4 shovels salt
2 shovels white pepper
24 bottles Worcestershire sauce
15 bottles rum
Coke to taste
8 qt. peanut oil (optional)*

Preparation

Mix 1 1/2 ounces rum with Coke; drink.
Wash and dry elephant (don't use shampoo as this will spoil the flavor).
Chop into bite size pieces.